Hi guys I apologize for not getting back to some of you quicker but it has been crazy. This is the favorite part of what I do on my blog so please keep the questions coming!
Professor: My concern is making sure you hold the Father of the child accountable so that you do not bear all the responsibility of raising this child alone. Stand up in your Divaness getting help is your right...smile.
Professor: The bedroom and sex play are like Las Vegas what goes on there should stay there. We all have our buttons that get us randy. I know you have heard the expression it is not what they call you but what you answer to. Try getting into and call him names back as long as he is not calling you his Ex. Remember fantasy is a two way street what gets you going? Is it toe sucking? So the next time he starts the cat calling present him with your big toe....smile.
Professor: I think the bigger question is why doesn't everyone love gay men. Let's face it there is a lot of festive, fierceness to love....smile. There has always been a love affair between straight women and gay men. We are sometimes the best part of the male ego without the ugly selfish side...lol. We treat you like the Divas that you are and support your dreams, listen to your problems and offer a safe place to land when things do not work out.
Why ask why and just enjoy the love fest....smile.
I’m stopped at a red light and all of a sudden I feel my car vibrate and see my water bottle trembling, like in the movie “Jurassic Park” right before the T-Rex arrives.
The music, coming from the car beside me, was blasting at levels that satellites could pick up.
I could detect the melodious sounds of F-bombs and N-word this and
N-word that. When I looked over to see what young "Yo MTV Rap" wannabe
this was, to my surprise it was a woman.
This was not a lollipop, pigtailed, bedazzled, pubescent teenager.
No, this vision, sporting a Roots-inspired head wrap, was a cigarette
dangling out the mouth, three girls in the backseat, loudly shouting
various expletives, hands throwing signs, grown "A" woman. Notice I did
not say lady.
Before I venture on, let me submit that the art to acting lady-like
may be a dying form. Here are some encounters – or teachable moments, as
I like to call them – that I’ve had in recent years:
--I was holding a door for a young female student and she walked in
on her cell phone without so much as a nod of acknowledgement. I
respectfully called out to her that this was not the Ritz and I was not a
bellhop. The phrase, I said, is “thank you.”
--I was teaching at Barber-Scotia College my first year and I had
started my lecture when this young female walks in 20 minutes late,
tipping and a bouncing, sporting a tight midriff, skirt cut up to the
ovaries and stacked heels. Of course all eyes were on her. I got through
my lecture and spoke to her after class. I said. “Young lady, you look
very cute, but this is a professional environment.” She looked at me
blankly. I continued, “You want people to respect you for your
intellect, don't you?” (Insert cricket noises.) Finally I said, "Boo, I
cannot compete with your cleavage. We are here to develop your mind, not
your bust line. Save that outfit for the club.” She never dressed like
that again in my class and proved to be a very bright student.
--I was at the drugstore and this young girl was on her cell phone
talking loud, cursing and dropping the N-word and F-bombs. She could not
have been more than 15. It was one of those days, so I threw caution to
the wind, knowing this banshee might shank me. I approached her and
politely said, "That is some pretty ugly language coming from such a
lovely young lady." She sheepishly apologized and immediately lowered
her voice. An older black lady approached me later and said thank you.
Maybe young women want direction but, for whatever reason, are not getting the right support and attention.
I often counsel young women that you direct people, including men, on
how you want to be treated. I use my Mom as an example. We would often
go bowling, and a man would occasionally use foul language and immediate
turn to my Mother and apologize. I noticed that they never directed
their apologies toward the other women in the vicinity. This was because
my Mom carried herself like a lady.
There is nothing wrong with being strong, independent and confident, but where did we lose some of the softness?
So, for all you women out there who might be struggling with getting
your girly nature back, I offer Professor Locs’ 5 signs that you might
need a lady makeover:
No. 5. Your idea of getting your toes done is biting them while watching Maury.
No 4. You show up for Easter Hat Sunday wearing a Lakers baseball cap and matching jersey.
No 3. Last Mother’s Day your kids got you a doo rag and a box of Newport's.
No 2. Not only did the UPS man not hold the door for you, he asked you to grab two boxes for him.
And finally, No. 1: You get funny looks from other women in the restroom due to your preference of peeing standing up.
Apparently the bag hit him in the head he demanded an apology was cursed out and that's when the peanuts hit the fan.
The only thing scarier than an old Queen on a rampage is having said Queen be trapped in a confined space.
I love the children! They will always give you ultra drama.
This flight attendant went to the intercom, cursed everyone out, opened the door, engaged the slide, grabbed two beers and slid down to the tar mac. The only thing that would have made it more over the top, if he had belted out "I Did It My Way" in full falsetto wearing a red boa.
Some are hailing him as a hero for finally standing up to crazy rude travelers. I would be more concerned about the woman who pissed him off. She could have a hit on her by the pink posse mafia. They are everywhere. She could end up with a bad perm, a dreadful interior redesign or bootleg Botox.
I never get this kind of drama when I am traveling. I could have video taped the entire performance and sold it has an Off Broadway Play, The Jet Blue Blues starring Clay Aiken!
I wonder what she would do if they left the pickles off her burger, a full on crash into the lobby. My favorite part is the manager that pulls the crazy woman's hair through the window. How is that for customer service!
I worked the drive thru in high school and if that crazy heifer would have shown out like that she would have gotten some hot fresh fries dunked on her deranged butt....lol.
Queen Latifah is top bankable star of music, film and television. She must weigh the consequences of putting her private life out there for scrutiny, whatever her orientation.
This photo does not prove anything. I have some practical scenarios for this picture:
She could be talking to her "trainer".
The yaht could have swirved suddently throwing them both off balance.
This is her "stylist" and she is checking Queen for her measurements.
This is her 'acting coach" and they are reading lines for her upcoming role as Barbara Jordon.
It is the height of Rocky Moutain Spotted Fever Season and they are checking each other for ticks....laugh.
So like many of you I like to keep track of how I spend my hard earned
money. So nothing drives me crazier than people not giving me good
customer service.
Have you ever been somewhere and you speak and say good morning or how are
you and they give you that "deer in the head lights look." You know just
staring at you blankly like they are waiting for the "closed caption"
to kick in for clearer communication.
I was at Wal-Mart the other day and this young guy was ringing me up
and did not speak, did not make eye contact nor did he have any salutation
other than tossing my bag towards me. If I wanted to be completely
ignored I would go to the DMV and have it done by professionals.
Are we not in a recession? You would think folks with a job would be a
little more celebratory.
If you have read my blog you know nothing drives me crazier than greeters
who do not speak to you when you walk in the store. They put more energy into
looking up and around you than just speaking. That is all you do, you can't
handle that one job function?
I was at the grocery store and this young lady was scanning my groceries so
I decided to help her out and bag my own groceries. I noticed that she
was done scanning and was just watching me bag groceries. I finally
stopped and said "Boo, I have been at work all day, I am trying to help
you out." She came to her senses and finally started bagging
groceries.
I was recently at Chic Filet and I don't know if they include Xanax and
Ecstasy in their training modules but those folks are polite, enthusiastic and
professional. I love going in there just for the good vibes and nuggets.
My favorite scenario was when I was going through the drive thru at
Bojangles and I decided to order an extra biscuit at the window.
Apparently, BoomKeisha was not having it and begin to scold me very loudly
about how this messes her up on her register and I really needed to order at
the speaker next time.
I sat there listening to drive thru etiquette tips from this young ebony
goddess, with her Burgundy finger waves, pink acrylic nails and animated hand
gestures and somewhere between being completely caught off guard and mildly
entertained, I came to my senses.
I said "Surely somewhere in your vast training they have covered this
particular situation, girl if you don't go get me that extra
biscuit." We both laughed and I was off with my 2 piece and extra
biscuit.
I worked at McDonald's for years in High School. It was not the most
glamorous job but I was glad to be working and earning money. I knew it
was not my life's work so I did not feel trapped or ambivalent.
If you do not like dealing with people then don't work in customer
service! It's like being a teacher and saying I hate kids.
There is dignity in all honest work and if you have a job that involves
customer service would it really kill you to smile and be polite and if
so...fake it!
I know it has been awhile since I shared some eye candy with you guys. I found this guy during some of my "research"...laugh. I simply call him curly...enjoy!
bottle trembling, like in the movie “Jurassic Park” right before the T-Rex arrives.
